My New "Fertility" Acupuncturist

After conceiving briefly in March last year, I never thought that it would take me so long to conceive again, especially after going through some intense treatments under the same TCM doc who helped get me pregnant. From March 2009 to Jan 2010, we were thousands of dollars poorer, and the score was still a BIG FAT ZERO. I started having doubts about the effectiveness of his treatments. Who knows? Maybe our pregnancy was a fluke?

I desperately wanted to see a TCM physician who specializes in fertility, but nobody I knew who suffered from infertility sought treatment from an acupuncturist or chinese doctor. My husband and I were on a very lonely and quiet road all by ourselves. Only one other TCM physician came to mind which I had found on the internet over a year ago. It was the same doctor that we had considered before settling for our TCM doc we've had the past year. The only reason we did not go to him was that his clinic was located right across town from us which would take 45 minutes to get to. Inconvenience would greatly hinder our motivation to go for treatments especially if we had to go very regularly.

After re-reading his website again which claimed that he was "well known for treating infertility" we knew we had to consider him. But nobody we know has heard of him. We found ourselves back at square one again, asking the same question we did a year ago - Do we go for any old doctor we find on the internet? What if he's a Quack Doctor? But we had no other options. We have not reached the stage where we were comfortable with trying Clomid, or IUIs and IVFs yet. I believe in the principles of Traditional Chinese Medicine, and since I managed to get pregnant au naturel once, I am still convinced that I can do it again. So we decided to give him a shot!

On January 22nd, 1 week back from Boracay and 5 days after our last appointment with our old TCM doc, we went across town to see him. After being greeted by a young man in a white doctor's coat, and ushered straight to an acupuncture bed, we thought he was THE doctor. Good thing we asked for the doctor, which apparently was not him. Within a minute or two, a short, middle-aged, barefoot man in a short-sleeved shirt and shorts appeared. What? You gotta be kidding me? The doctor on the website was dressed in a suit and tie, and presumably shoes too! He explained that he was usually at the other clinic (which we weren't aware of) and that it was a rare occasion that we caught him there. Well, I guess it was his day off. But he proceeded to see us anyway.

So,

ROUND 1 - Ding! Ding! Over!
Conclusion - First Impressions NOT good!

I proceeded to explain to him why we were there to see him and I found out that he could not really speak English! OH MY GAWD! That's my worst nightmare! He didn't even understand the word "endometriosis". How are we ever going to understand each other? I only knew a smattering of chinese and it took all of me to communicate with him. My husband fared even worse with languages. We ended up speaking in a mixture of 3 languages!

I barely understood him, and I had no idea how to say ovulation, or period, or infertility, or poor sperm motility, or even sex in chinese! These are not the typical terms they teach you for everyday communication when you're learning a language. So what I know wasn't very helpful. At this point, it's pretty useless going up to him and saying in perfect Chinese, "Excuse me, where's the bus stop?" After struggling for some time, he got the gist and I got the gist of my diagnosis, which had something to do with dry heat and weak kidneys. He wrote me a prescription of herbal medicine and gave me a bunch of home-made black ball "herbal candy" to take with the medicine. And he gave DH some black pills to strengthen his sperm. And that was it! No acupuncture for me! And oh! He told us to abstain from sex for 1 month, but he also said I could go ahead and try when I asked him if we should give this month a shot. So I am all confused.

ROUND 2 - Ding! Ding! Over!
Conclusion - Communication Disaster! NOT good!

Then just before we left he noticed that hubby had a stuffy nose and said that he would treat it for him, free of charge. And that it would be very quick. He pricked a spot between DH's eyes and wiggled the needled a bit. He also pricked another point on his face. And it was all over in less than 30 seconds. DH, was astonished, more because his sinuses magically opened up and drained completely the moment he poked the needle in. He said his blocked sinus was gone in an instant!

ROUND 3 - Ding! Ding! Over!

Conclusion - Maybe he knows something about acupuncture. He's not a Quack Doctor?!?!

When we left we were still clueless about how his treatments were going to unfold. All we knew was that we were to come see him at his other clinic on February 5th. That's 2 weeks on, which is a really long gap, compared to the twice weekly visits I am used to. 

I was pretty speechless after our visit with him. It was not what I had expected at all. I really did not know what to think! It was a very difficult session, but I was intrigued, and still desperate. I had to go back and see what else he has to offer. 

His clinic does not dispense herbal medicine, so I went to a chinese herbal store and ordered 3 packets to try out his formula first. Well, it was pretty disgusting - after boiling it, what I got was this thick, black, gluggy goo. When the concoction starts to cool, a skin would start to form over it. That's how gross it was! The taste was pretty vile, but still downable. And the black ball "candy" was NOT candy at all! I miss my TCM doc's herbals medicine... :-( 

Well, the only consolation was that I only had to drink his herbal medicine every second day! 

My next post - Why I call him Dr Yeeeouch! 

To Defect Or Not To Defect?

Its 11DPO and this 2 Week Wait is driving me absolutely CRAZY! I am glad I've got a lot of updating to do on my blog, though I've been spending time on the internet instead obsessing about 2WW symptoms - again! I just never learn do I, even after another year of futile obsessions during the 2WWs of 2009!

As I have hinted, much has changed in my TCM routine this year. For one, I have only seen my regular TCM doc once this year. I felt like we had come to the end of the road with him, especially when the last cycle under his care ended up in me having an anovulatory cycle. In lay terms -

No ovulation = No egg = No chance in hell of conceiving!

So when that happened, it's like,

What's going on here? I'm getting worse!

Because from what I know, and what my Fertility Friend and OPKs tell me, I usually do ovulate every cycle.

I know these things happen occasionally and who can ever be sure why, but it's just easier for me to blame him! Time is ticking... And granted that he did help me get pregnant for the first time in my life last year, there hadn't been anymore pregnancies under his care since my m/c in March '09. I was getting worried. And time is still ticking...

My husband and I had developed a great relationship with him over the year, but he hadn't given us what we wanted. I don't care how many couples he's helped got pregnant since. It's always frustrating to hear about so and so who got pregnant. Everyone he's helped seems to be getting pregnant except us. I had no idea why or what to do. If I hadn't been pregnant under his care I would have left a long time ago, but he did help me get pregnant once naturally, and that was the hold that he had on me. I looked very hard for signs that it was time to move on. After our last visit with him, I pretty much got all the signs I needed.

The First Sign - he hardly showed any concern for our inability to conceive last year. Infact, he suggested that we cool it off and wait for three months instead.


What? You want us to Wait?

I'm thinking, there had better be a damn good reason for this. Turns out, his reason was not based on ovaries or qi or meridiens or hormones, but based completely on his beliefs in the chinese horoscope! He really believed that a baby born in the Year of the Tiger (which starts on Feb 14, 2010) was a really bad match for us, especially for my husband, a "monkey". He said that it would be tough on my husband while the kid's growing up and very tough for our child later trying to grow up under a "monkey" parent. It would be a very difficult relationship. Wow! That really threw me off. I wasn't expecting that at all! We cried out in disbelief but all he kept saying was, "Trust me. Believe in what old people have to say."

Well, that got me really nervous. The chinese horoscope is fun, but I've never taken it seriously. Could our dreams of having a happy family be ruined by the timing of our child's birth? He wanted us to wait 3 months so that our child would be born after the Year of the Tiger. Telling an aging, desperate infertile to wait and do nothing for 3 months is like being banished to hell to suffer for eternity! I had to go and have a consult with Dr Google and see what he says. More on that later.

The Second Sign - I didn't feel like he was focused on our problems anymore. Sure he has dying patients with cancer and life threatening diseases, and babies with brain development problems that are in much dire need of his attention, but I want my TCM doc to treat us like we were his one-and-only most important patient in the world that he would drop everything for! And he was not giving that to us anymore. He was also spending less time in the clinic these days, being more focused on getting his other clinic opened within the next month. He's stretched thin, and his staff never knows when he would be in. I like it when he used to be there 24/7 (seriously - he even works on sundays and public holidays).

He gave us an excuse to disappear. So, (take a deep breath...)

We defected!

We had one last electro-acupuncture with him that session. (By the way, when he pricked that spot over my right ovary, the pain was so intense, my screaming startled him! Yup - either he wasn't careful or something was going on at that acupuncture point!) We got one week's worth of herbal medicine to boil at home and we have not seen him since.

Coming soon... Introducing our new acupuncture fertility specialist...

Dr Yeeeouch!

First Report Card of 2010

Continuing on from Boracay...

Boracay was rather fun for what it was. You can tell if you looked at me because I put on something like 2-3 kgs when I was there! Yup! There went the TCM diet!

If pregnancy experts gave a demerit point for everything I did or ate wrong, I would have flunked miserably. Well, I didn't care, cos, well,... I had no egg. They're missing! So what pregnancy? Therefore, I absolutely did not care. It was so liberating, having no rules. I guess that's why it was fun! There were milkshakes galore from the island's best fruit milkshake hut (yummmm!) --that means dairy (swoon!) and ice (swoon, swoon!)! Then there were ice-cold cokes. And swimming in icy cold water-- All the cold things that are banned for a woman who is predisposed to having a cold body. Even though Boracay was a balmy 30˚C/86˚F the water was freezing! It was funny watching everyone's reaction when they hit the water! It wasn't just me! So in short Boracay was very bad for my body.

So what has Boracay done to my body? Here comes the report card...

I went to see my usual TCM doc as soon as I got back. He was very impressed with the beautiful photos we took, but he was NOT impressed with me.

"What happened? Why are you so cold? But your Qi is really good though."

I guess there were no surprises there. I sinned. I did evil things. But I was happy! My Qi was happy!

But that got me thinking - If all the acupuncture, and herbal medicine, and moxa that he's given me for the entire past year and 2 months I was with him have not been able to strengthen my body well enough to take 2 weeks of abuse, how good of a doctor is he really? I got pregnant under his care during the first 4 months but it's been a dry 10-month spell since. I was getting impatient and worried. It's no fun celebrating a 1-year anniversary of being with your TCM doc when there are no results. Was it time to move on? Try a different doctor or method perhaps? I had told him last year that we were giving ourselves till March 2010, and then we would consider other options. But I was already itching to move on.

My heart was really heavy with indecision. I truly believed that he's a good TCM physician, but fertility wasn't one of his strong points or specialty. But who do we go to? Nobody I knew knew anyone to recommend. So here we go again. Do we go for an unknown doctor I randomly find on the internet again? I had found another TCM physician who claimed to specialize in fertility on his website. They say they are :

"..well known for treating infertility. Our successes in assisting childless couples to conceive have been one of the most rewarding part of our mission. The tears of joy and happiness in seeing proud 'parents to be' is what makes all our efforts all the more worthwhile."

That was pretty much the clincher for me, the oh-so desperate infertile.

So, the big question now --

 Do we defect? 


Stay tuned.